Enchanting Things

As of today, my 7th day here, I have written over 12, 000 words (1/4 of most novels, I hear) and about 10 chapters.  I am very happy with this and feel that when I return home, I will have a great start to my book.  I am very aware, partially through this process, that it will take a good amount of time to actually finish this piece.  I am gaining the skeleton of it here and will continue my "story" up to a certain point, but have a long road of making it good and enjoyable to read.  But I am excited to keep continuing with it and feel very satisfied with my endeavor here.  

I road my bike on the Santa Fe Trail the other day and got myself high enough to get some nice views.  

I haven't paid much to go to museums this visit as I find art everywhere!

 
As with all of my visits to this area, I always feel a connection - the enchanted part calling to me.  I have discovered as I delved deeper into some of the literature and resources I was using for inspiration that all of these authors and artists had spent time in Northern New Mexico! Including Carl Jung and a lesser known artist from Finland, Akseli Gallen-Kallelas who is best known as the illustrator for a poem called Kalevela, which apparently inspired J.R.R Tolkein's books.  The reason that I know of this artist, is that I happened to visit his home near Helsinki while traveling with my father in the late 1980's.  During that visit I took a picture of a floor mosaic that Gallen-Kallelas had created with his footprints and a compass with the words "I shall return to my footstep" written on it.  I remember this mosaic often in life when I think of special places in my life that I know that somehow I will return to. Santa Fe has always been an interesting place for me to return to...

I have a habit/tradition whenever I am traveling to take a picture of my foot in that place.  I know that some of this habit comes from that mosaic.  I rarely plan to take these pictures, but eventually look down and see that the ground is cool! I have pictures of my foot on the ancient cobblestones of Central Park in New York, on a beautiful hike in Aspen, at the Chinese Theater in L.A. among all the movie stars' footprints...My favorite is one of my sons feet next to mine on a beach while on a vacation in San Diego.  I took the above one by this yellow bush while on a walk because it smelled so good!

This town is full of little nooks and crannies, tiny doors and windows.  Today I saw this little stencil randomly painted near a doorway.  Below, I just had to visit the Miraculous Staircase.  It is a bit of a tourist trap, but it is very pretty and I love the story behind it.  There are a lot of people on the internet that claim it is not a miracle, but I say: define miracle!  The staircase was built to solve the problem of getting to the choir part of the chapel as the architect was killed before the chapel was finished.  An unnamed carpenter showed up and soaked his own wood and, using no nails, created this double helix staircase that was not only beautiful, but practical in that it saved room.  The carpenter left afterwards, never being paid and never to be seen again.  I think one could qualify that as some sort of cool miracle...

Inspired by an artist I made friends with and had dinner with last night, I am embracing my acrylic paints again over my meticulous water colors - I loved creating a quick, tiny, but satisfying painting today!  Thank you, Linda for the conversation that centered on art and dogs!  My husband called me today and tried to talk about "important stuff."  I declined to take part just yet as I know that I will soon have an ample amount of responsibility waiting for me as soon as I arrive home.

Otherwise, I am very thankful that I have had the time to write, paint and not only be able to be inspired, but to have that surplus time to ponder that inspiration, use it and make it part of me.

Inspiration and Progress

It is soooo pretty here.  A photo tends to even look artistic with a darn telephone pole in the middle of it!  There is something about those clouds, the light.  There are roses everywhere and I have heard that some of them are heirloom.  Everywhere I walk I can smell lovely things growing!

A lot of my writing has to do with sense-of-place and I am realizing that Santa Fe is such a fitting environment for me to get a greater perspective on that.  I have learned that on the rare occasion that they build something new here, when they start digging up the foundation, the local archeologists must be present as artifacts are often found.  Not only 100's of years of civilization has made this area their home, but 10's of thousands of years.  They might find a skeleton buried within the walls of an old adobe while renovating or a pot of ancient seeds within a new foundation!  I love that I can ride my bike around and something like this ancient church suddenly appears!
By fate, I found in my casita a cool book called House as a Mirror of Self.   This book has given me interesting further insight.  It talks of Carl Jung's building of his precious Bollingen Tower (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bollingen_Tower) a "concretization of the psyche," in that he was drawn to represent his thoughts and knowledge through something material - "a symbol of psychic wholeness."  I suppose that is a bit of what I am doing too...

When I write I use a myriad of resources - got out some Walt Whitman, Einstein and then my Vogue for a little brain breather...And I have been writing a lot and found a "skeleton" for the flow of putting things together, thus I am even able to lable chapters, which is really helpful for tracking my progress.  I am finding in my exploration of place and home, that my dear city is a big center of my reflection and sentimentality.  It has changed so much and I am enjoying the documentation process of realizing how different places and times had their place in constructing me.  Did you know our current governor was my boss as I worked in the very first days of the Wynkoop Brewing Company?  That place was so revolutionary in building the Denver (as well as the craft-brew industry) that is the fun place it is today...

I have also had time to paint, yay!

To get myself a bit more social, I went on a fabulous restaurant tour with the Santa Fe School of Cooking - experienced some yummy food and met people from all over the US.

 

 

A shot of my "writing den".  It's been just right for hunkering down and doing this, yet within walking distance of so many inspiring places!

Ok, this is rewarding...but not easy!

The type-A personality in me is humbled by this sculpture - yes, Jill, you are human...

A couple of things I am learning today: This is work and going through two decades of personal history is like dropping a piano on my own head!  

This morning the blank page did stare me down and when I went through all of my years of writing, I found that I needed to do it in bed with a box of tissues next to me!  Sometimes no matter how hard you plan (Miss Type-A-Jill!) things shall go another way...another lesson (re-)learned.

Clearly, at the very least, a transition day needs to happen as I transform from mom-teacher-wife to temporarily, solely myself - all the good, bad or ugly that made me who I am right now!  As the fog lifted, I kept on.  I took a break and started a painting.  Then I picked one metaphor that I really love that I recently revisited both in writing and in "real-life."  If any younger mommies are reading, The Swing became a huge part of our school year at Milestones this year.  So many of the children learned to pump on their own. Similar to when children learn to ride a bike, the moment is full of elation and magic. What adult doesn't remember what that felt like?  I have crystal clear memories of swinging as  a young child and can also still hear my dear departed grandmother reciting Robert Louis Stevenson's poem of The Swing from A Child's Garden of Verses.  Anyway, I am going to share a bit of the writing I did today, using the swing as a metaphor...

Like a pendulum the barefoot, smiling child goes back and forth.  Joyful. Up in the air so blue. Her hair shining in the sun, giggles drifting through the warm summer breeze.  Our childhood simplicity and innocence emerges, illuminated through this one fluid act. The to and fro motion, not unlike a cradle rocking, alternating in rhythm; blue sky, green grass, blue sky, green grass...  She feels like a bird.  If only the swing could act as a time machine and her adult self could go back to that idyllic freedom layered in the security of home like a warm blanket.

I'll keep working on that piece, but if all I have to show for today is the beginning of that thought, I feel like I got a little somewhere...

On that note, I am going to seek out some nurturing posole somewhere around here. Below are some ancient, colorful windows and doors within the backdrop of that calming adobe...Adieu, cockatoo.

 

Miss Jill's Solo Sojourn in Santa Fe

Sometimes a teacher, or a mother or a wife or a daughter or a person, needs to get away from all that is cherished and familiar, in order to remember why she cherishes those things.  In my particular case, I am of a certain age, my child is in college, my dog died...it's just time.  Time to make a well-planned runaway, an organized displacement, a, as I told myself several decades the last time I did this, writing in my journal on a northbound train, running away from my sensible boyfriend...I needed a significant interruption.  An interruption other than the fabulous one that happened when I learned I was pregnant and began to fall in love with responsibility.  An interruption other than "accidentally" finding "the one" at age 45.

This interruption/displacement/runaway is ALL MINE.

The first one since 1992!  Where I get to choose my adventure, my interruption. So, of course at this point in my life, this choose-my-own-adventure had to be well planned in light of those responsibilities I fell in love with way back when.  But I planned well enough to be able to get away not just physically, but that all too critical, mentally.  Without some mental freedom, an adventure could get wasted.  So I planned.  I paid ahead. I pre-packed for a month!  For these 10 days.

My adventure is one, I realized, that has been brewing in my heart and mind since a very young age (before leaving on this sojourn I re-read all of the journals I have written since 1987.) So this adventure had a place on my newly written bucket list.  An, if-you-don't-do-this-pretty-soon-you-never-will adventure.

I have landed in Santa Fe, New Mexico.  I have rented my adorable casita.  I have brought a few boxes containing writing I have done for a couple of decades.  It's time.  We'll see what happens. I seem to be ready to write. No staring at a blank screen or empty sheet of journal-page.  I was so ready to write I even scribbled a few lines while driving!
When I left I was groggy and a bit stressed this morning.  The transition of "getting somewhere" can get in my way of embracing the journey.

 

But lo' and behold, the longer I drove, the more relaxed I became.  I enjoyed the views out my window.  Played an old CD from the 1990's which made me feel 28 again.  And, it almost seemed, the more miles I put behind me, a few layers of skin and wrinkles and years slipped right off of me and it was almost like I was 28 again.

This writing, this blog, is not the writing I am here to do.  This blog is for you, for my same-age mommies who are also embarking on their empty-nest adventures - a flight attendant in the making and a new business owner - you are my inspiration and my confidants and I am reporting to you. This blog is also for my young-mommies who usually read the blog I do about their children.  You mommies may need to do this some day.  So this is for you too.  And, for anyone else I tell about this blog - my family so you can see I'm "okay" and my husband, of course, so you can see I'm really doing stuff! Random friends I think might be vaguely interested in what I am doing. There is no pressure to read this.  It is mostly for fun.  But also, I want to pass along the idea that it is never too late to do some of your dreams...

I rewarded myself for the longest drive I have done solo since age 28 with a delicious green chili cheese burger!  Kirk out.  More tomorrow.